How November Changed My Life
Every year, around this time, I start to reminisce about my life. I start to analyze (mostly overanalayze) the highs and the lows, the successes and the failures, and as life would present it, question who I am to myself first, to my family next, and then to the world. You see, each year, on November 22nd, I officially by the book turn a year older and this year like every other year in my life is no different, I turn 27!
For some reason, 26 felt young. I still felt closer to 21 than I did 30 and I still had absolutely no shame saying I was 26. But for some odd reason, 27 is scary! It kind of feels low key like doom because hello, 30; impending mid life crisis, children, and then all of a sudden you blink and you are 60 approaching retirement and what do I have to show for my life right? Scroll down for more...
“For two months before my 25 birthday, I cried; everyday. I was miserable.”
Somewhere after 25, I realized that I am not kind to myself. In fact, I may enjoy torturing myself more times than not and I have a hard time dwelling in the satisfaction of success because I feel like I could always be doing more. For two months before my 25 birthday, I cried; everyday. I was miserable. I felt like life had zipped on by and somehow I had been carelessly thrown out of the whirlwind of my early twenties and knocked my head hard against reality. At that time, It appeared as if all my dreams that I had when I was 16 had not only not come into fruition, but had been completely vandalized and possibly erased. Granted, when I was 16 and starting college, I felt as if I was going to seriously conquer the world. Fast forward to almost ten years later at 25, back living in my mom’s house (which wasn’t a huge deal really), broke and in incredible student debt, and a poor excuse of a graduate student. Talk about pessimistic!
The day after my 25th birthday, I woke up feeling just fine. I looked in the mirror and I looked the same as the day before. The day I had been mourning for many weeks had come and I woke up the next day, feeling very fine. I realized I had been manifesting this negative energy for weeks and I may have convinced myself of a big fat lie. I felt horrible because I was not compassionate to myself and also not loving to myself. Nonee, you have done far beyond what you even expected of yourself. Sometimes we don’t stop to give ourselves the pat on the back or the accolades we deserve. By tormenting myself, I was not practicing self-care.
“Sometimes we don’t stop to give ourselves the pat on the back or the accolades we deserve.”
Everyday I am growing and working to become a better version of myself. Each day I wake up and commit to love others, show kindness and compassion, be respectful, be honorable, and be a woman of integrity first and foremost to myself and then to others. Self-Care for me looks like taking mental health days off and also taking my mental health seriously, knowing the value of yes and no (still learning), fostering relationships that feed my soul, sprinkling in French fries, taking short showers but taking forever to apply lotion all over my body, watching my favorite shows, showing up to Target at least once a week, snuggling with my husband, having honest conversations with God, having honest conversations with myself, and creating lists so that I can crazily cross things off! What are some things you do for self-care? Comment below...
November changed my life. Each year in November, I take time to look back at the year and just dwell in gratitude. Thank you Jesus for bringing me through another year and for the successes of the year. I am thankful for the small things and the big things. I graduated from graduate school in May, I secured a job for the fall in June, I planned a whole wedding alongside my family and friends, my dad walked me down the aisle, I got married in August, two weeks later I passed boards, I moved into a new apartment with hubby, and all the while, I was still blogging more than half-time and securing brand collaborations. There are many other things I am grateful for. What are you grateful for? The spirit of gratitude is the most powerful thing I can do for my self care.
“The spirit of gratitude is the most powerful thing I can do for my self care.”
Loves, I usually don’t get this personal in my blog posts. I like to be transparent but this post has to be one of my most personal posts ever. I have partnered up with several CT Bloggers for a blog hop so please check out their articles linked below to see what they are up to this November! I hope you find some inspiration in this post and be sure to share your self care tips with me. Until next time, big bisous!